Dear Dr. vybe: How Can I Avoid Getting Too Drunk at the Mummers Parade?

 

Dear Dr. vybe,

While most of the world can agree that it’s the most wonderful time of the year, South Philadelphians know the true holiday celebration doesn’t start until the Mummers Parade.

Every year, I start my New Year’s Day morning by taking a couple shots, stuffing my backpack with beer, and venturing up to City Hall from Washington Ave. Trust me when I say I need that much alcohol to keep me feeling warm and festive the whole way.

This is the one time of the year that I go all out (unless the Eagles somehow manage to win the Super Bowl again) — and I don’t see why I should stop. It’s not like I’m hurting anybody (no drunk driving here — I’m a proud SEPTA pass holder). But I must admit, I do tend to go overboard and end up missing the “Two Street” party. So how can I stay in the Mummer’s spirit without having to get my stomach pumped? 

Sincerely,
Already Preparing a Mummers Cocktail

 

Dear Already Preparing a Mummers Cocktail,

Plenty of people push their limits every once in a while, and everyone has their one big thing. If yours involves chasing parades in sub-freezing temperatures — so be it. But don’t let the alcohol make you think you can handle more than you can.

If you start out your day knowing your limits, you might be able to drown out the drunken voice telling you to take another shot. Some people know how much is too much based on personal experience, but you can calculate what your approximate blood alcohol level would be per drink based on your physical traits. Try to stay under your magic number, and listen to your body if you start to feel the effects quickly.

The best thing aside from that is to alternate your alcoholic drinks with nonalcoholic ones to slow your consumption and to rehydrate your body. Try carrying bottled water with you to sip on in between, and make sure it’s an equal amount to what you’re consuming in alcohol. Eating before and during drinking will also help with pace and absorption.

Like you already pointed out, why go overboard and end up missing half the party? The parade waits for no one — so try to keep yourself together long enough to make it to Two Street and close out the festivities. If the alcohol gets the best of you despite all of this and you start getting sick or your skin turns pale, make sure you have a designated friend who will be able to get you to a nearby vybe safely. We’ll do our best to get you back in Mummers shape before the winners are announced.

Sincerely,
Time to Start Thinking About Mocktails